How Angry Are You?

Over the years I’ve heard people say things like ‘I never get angry’ or, ‘I can’t remember the last time I got angry’.

Anger can be a strange one.

Same with anxiety.

I’ve noticed people often don’t recognise anger or anxiety until they’re full blown. They believe anger is only present when people are shouting, throwing things or displaying red in the face rage, and anxiety is only when someone is visibly shaking, having difficulty breathing or experiencing uncontrolled sobbing.

But when you look a little deeper, you see various stages of anger and/or anxiety in many, many people. So many are dissatisfied with life – their own life or the wider world and it’s events and injustices. Many are showing their anger on social media and hurling abuse at others.

Many people spend their days doing jobs they dislike, with people they don’t relate to or don’t like or get on with. They continue to do these things because they believe there is no other way and they need to earn an income. This can bring a state of frustration, dissatisfaction and underlying anger and possibly even anxiety.

If you look at all the parts of your life that you’re wishing were different, how does it make you feel?

Do you feel annoyed, like it’s not fair and you shouldn’t have to be in this situation? Maybe you feel like you’ve worked hard and this shouldn’t be happening?

Maybe you’re pissed off because your partner/spouse (etc) isn’t doing what you think they should be doing? Maybe it’s the people you work with, or friends and family members?

But it’s not them – it’s you. Sorry ❤️

It’s not the situation – it’s you. Sorry again 💙

Now I don’t for one minute dismiss the possibility that your situations and the people around you aren’t perfect and perhaps changes may need to be made, but no matter what’s happening in our lives we ALWAYS have a choice as to how we respond and deal with everything and everyone that comes into our consciousness.

Underlying anger and anxiety come from non acceptance. Yes this can be tricky to understand and to practice but it’s the first step to feeling at peace, followed by true happiness. Acceptance of things (and people) means we recognise that it’s our choice – do we hold on to frustration and anger because things are not how we think they should be, or do we release those beliefs and – sorry to sound like an old hippy – ‘go with the flow’.

Going with the flow doesn’t mean an altered state of mind or pretending everything is hunky dory. It simply means we drop the struggle and start enjoying each day, each moment, just as it is. It means we look for all the good that surrounds us and keep our minds on that, rather than on everything we think is wrong. Observe things and people with curiosity, rather than judgment or strong expectation of how you think it should be.

Humans are masters of taking out frustrations on others and blaming, rather than looking into our own thoughts, feelings and behaviours and making wiser choices.

Taking this approach and facing situations with the presence of inner calm means we are stronger and have more resilience towards all of life’s challenges. We grow from strength to strength when we find our inner peace – the source of lasting happiness. The more we practice, the more peace and happiness we enjoy.

When we allow our feelings of frustration (which is anger) to rule our days, life is rarely pleasant and when this is happening on an ongoing basis, the next step is looking for relief in the form of alcohol, smoking, food, shopping, sex etc – which can then become compulsions/addictions and this always brings more anger and dissatisfaction with life.

It’s wise to remember the choices you make can determine whether or not Every Day Gets Better. 😀❤️

Thank you to Buddhist Journal for this Quote and Image. ❤️
For more help on this topic, check out the R.A.I.N. article in my previous post. 💙